Talking to children about an upcoming divorce is important. It’s going to be a bit different depending on their age levels. They will have different questions and need different amounts of information.
That said, kids of any age are probably going to have questions. It’s important for you as a parent to give them time to ask these questions so that you can reassure them and help them through this process. Here are a few examples of things they may ask.
1. Where am I going to live?
For children, divorce is a time of change. It can be helpful for them to know where they’ll live, which parent they’ll be with and what the general schedule is going to look like. You may not know the specifics until after the child custody order has been issued, but you can give them an idea of what life will look like.
2. Do I have to go to a different school?
It’s also important for parents to understand that children are going to have different concerns than adults. They may be worried about their class at school, their peer group, their friends in the neighborhood and things of this nature. Adults should address these issues, even if they don’t seem as important as other aspects of the divorce.
3. Did I cause this?
Finally, many children struggle with feelings of guilt, assuming that they must have caused the divorce. They may blame themselves or think that one of their parents just doesn’t want to be in their life anymore. It is very important to sit down with a child and explain that this is in no way their fault.
As you move toward the divorce, take the time to carefully look into your legal options to continue putting your child first.